I thought I’d share this with my followers and people who are facing similar situations. My sister has been battling cancer for a few years and some of you might recall that I ask for some prayers at various points.
Such battle changes one on many levels, especially on a spiritual level. Each going on this journey have to make his/her own decision how to fight the battle. I post this to give those in similar situations hope.
I want to give hope to people in similar situations
“Cancer has been part of my journey from March 2017, when I was diagnosed with breast cancer stage 3. This was one of the most difficult times in my life, and it felt like a death sentence at that stage. No one in our family ever had cancer and I always thought cancer was the last thing that would cross my path. So, this diagnosis was overwhelming and a big shock to me and my family. I quickly realized that cancer is a very lonely road. It is not like any other illness; it is a journey that can ether bring you closer to Abba Father or make you angry and bitter. I choose to walk every step of this journey with my hand in Father’s .
After the initial shock I decided I will overcome this cancer with Father on my side. Psalm 91 became my anchor during these times
I felt very alone, it felt like no one really understood what I was going through, not even my husband.
A lot of tests was done and it really started getting overwhelming for me, all the stress with every test, thinking about whether they will find more cancers, etc. But all along my journey Father send me treasured moments that made me strong and built my faith. One of these treasured moments was when I went for a scan to see if the cancer has spread to my bones( skeleton). I was overcome with fear that day. In the reception room was a lady that knew me. Her words to me were: “you will be fine; you will get through this”. After the appointment I was sitting in my car looking in the rear-view mirror, when I saw these white ducks walking by. The Holy Spirit nudged me to count them. It was seven white ducks! Seven stands for completeness, perfection. The Holy Spirit showed me through these ducks that He will heal me completely, I will be perfect in His eyes. These treasured moments kept me going.
The oncologist decided I need to go for a mastectomy and chemo afterwards. The day of the mastectomy I felt Yahweh’s peace within me. That old song, “Because He lives, I can face tomorrow”, played over and over in my head. I just knew Father is with me every step of the way.
After the mastectomy it took me quite a while to accept my changed body and face myself in the mirror. But through all this Father freed me from finding my worth in how I look.
Ten days after my first chemo, my hair started falling out. I thought I would be fine, like I would handle it. But when my hair started to fall out one morning in the shower, I was overwhelmed and deeply traumatized. I immediately decided to shave what was left. It gave me some control over the situation. First, I wore hats, scarfs, etc, to hide my bald head, but I felt uncomfortable with that. So, one day I decided to accept the way I look and put nothing on my head, and that was quite freeing to me.
The further I was into the chemotherapy, the sicker I became. So, I was really struggling through chemo. The last day of my chemo, Father spoiled me with another treasured moment. As I was leaving the chemo building, I saw, what looked to me like a dead rat, in the middle of the road. I touched it with my shoe and realized that it was alive. I picked it up in my red scarf and to my surprise, it was a kitten. He must have just been born, his umbilical cord was still attached, and he was so cold. As I picked him up and wrapped him in my scarf, Holy Spirit whispered grace in my ear. He reminded me that this little kitten got his second chance, so Father gave me a second chance. My ginger cat is still with us and His name is Grace, a reminder of Father’s grace for me every day.
I have such empathy for others on this road which I am on. We need to stand still and be with each other in time of need, come alongside each other, and comfort and encourage one another.
After my chemo I was declared clear of cancer.
Eighteen months passed, and then I felt something is wrong. Scans revealed that I had cancer of the uterus, and a spot on my liver. I had to undergo a radical hysterectomy, chemo and radiation. This time Father gave me Psalm 30: “O LORD my God, I cried to you for help, and You healed me.” This verse I kept repeating over and over when I felt overcome by everything. I decided against chemo and followed a natural approach. During this time Father really laid it on my heart to deal, more intensethan before, with forgiveness. It took a lot of work from my side, to really forgive everyone that Father brought to mind. But the peace and abundant live I received afterwards, dealing with everything, was worth it. It felt like I only started living for the first time. Why have I wasted so much time ?
About six months after the hysterectomy, I went for a check-up. From the moment I awoke that morning, I heard this Afrikaans song over and over in my mind. The words, translated, are: “The Lord is with you, He is your rock in times of trouble. He is around you; darkness becomes light”. While I was on my way to the appointment, it still kept repeating in my mind. I asked Father what is He preparing me for, what is going to happen? Never even thinking that this appointment will show up cancer again. The doctor found cancer where they removed the womb. I needed to go for chemo and radiation, which I decided against. I changed my diet drastically and took a lot of natural supplements. I was feeling healthy and full of energy.
How wonderful is our loving Father for giving me the peace of this words and preparing me for what lay ahead!
During July 2020 I began to experience extreme, really unbearable tummy aches. In October 2020, I just could not handle it anymore and went to see the doctor, who referred me to the ER. They did some test and said I have a hernia, which they are going to operate. After the operation the doctor informed me that they found cancer, the previous cancer spread to the fleece that cover the intestines and organs and also in the liver.
The evening I received this shocking news, Gill, a caring friend, send me some Anchor For Cancer teachings. How wonderful Father works! That teaching lifted my spirit and I just knew Father will carry me through this as well. Matthew 9:21 was the special verse Father gave me that evening to cling to. “But Yeshua turned, and when He saw her He said, take courage, daughter your belief has healed you. And the woman was healed from that hour.
I decided against chemo, much to the oncologist’s disgust; and she explained to me how the cancer will in her view develop and what I should expect. Well, everything from then on seems to happen exactly as she explained, and I believed this was the beginning of the end. I was in extreme pain, no medication, not even morphine could keep the pain at bay. Twice after October, I landed in hospital just to control the pain. I couldn’t eat, nothing stayed down. I was lying most of the time just trying to live through the pain.
On the 18th of January the 18th 2021, my husband decides he can’t stand by and watch as I am slowly dying and he took me to the ER. At this stage I really didn’t care what happened to me; I was ready to die. In fact, I prayed and asked Father to please come and take me home, I cannot handle this pain anymore. But Father had other plans for me, “Take courage daughter, your belief has healed you. The ER doctor immediately said this is not cancer, but rather an obstruction. They did an emergency operation where they removed a part from my large as well as some of the small intestines. Afterwards the doctor told me he didn’t think I was going to make it through the operation. A week passed before I could eat anything without being sick. What a wonderful feeling to be able to eat solid food after four months. Remember, the doctor informed me that I must enjoy the last months that I have to live; but I immediately reminded him that my life is in Yahweh’s hands and only He decides when my time is up.
I really struggled to overcome the doctor’s “death sentence” over my life. So, I decided to get everything in order for when I die. My husband and I went away for an evening where we could just talk through everything and cry together. Also talking about the future of my husband and our two adopted sons’ life without me. This was freeing to me and it felt like a heavy weight was lifted from my shoulders. It was as if something changed from that moment on and that I could start living my life again.
I started attending Anchor For Cancer zoom meetings, and what a wonderful, encouraging and uplifting experience it has been so far. All the testimonials and scripture we receive weekly, means so much to me. During the zoom meetings we encourage each other and pray. I will really recommend anyone living with cancer or who are taking care of a cancer patient, to join Anchor For Cancer.
It was also during the “healing” zoom meeting, that, I believe, Father healed me completely. He showed me that I only need to rely on Him: no medication, no diet, no supplements, no doctor or oncologist can heal me. He is my healer.
How precious is the way Father works with us! The verse Gill gave me when she prayed about my healing was the same Word Father gave me in the hospital about the women touching the hem of Yeshua’s garment.
Although it appears that my healing hasn’t manifested completely in my body, I believe I am already healed.
Just to confirm my healing, the caring Hospice sister came to visit me to see for herself how well I am doing. She decided to take me of the Hospice’s books. How wonderful is that!
Every day is a special gift from Father, and I learned to live only one day at a time. His grace is always enough.
How did I cope during my darkest days?
Worship was one of my coping mechanisms. When I was lying in extreme pain during all those months, I could only lay there and listen to lyrics written from the Word. Worship music was my soft comfort blanket wrapped around me in God’s love.
How did worship bring healing to my mind?
When we adore God in worship it takes our hearts away from negativity to positivity.
I was often gripped with these kinds of thoughts: How am I going to live? How am I going to get over this? Will I see my children growing up?
But then, during worship I hear God’s words of comfort and reassurance: “I am in control; I will take you safely through to the other side, whether it is here on earth or in heaven. I love your children even more than you love them; I will take care of them, I will make sure they receive the best and that they are provided for, always.”
Worship is surrender to God on an ongoing basis. It is every breath I take. It’s about how I handle a situation when I am offended or hurt. My response to another represents my worship to God and what my Father has taught me. It’s also about how much have I learnt from Him during my trials and tribulations? And: Am I being obedient to Him in my behaviour towards others? Am I learning my lessons along the way?
I think of my relationship with my kids: How do I feel when I find their clothing on the floor after asking them regularly to pick up their clothes from the floor? Then I would ask them: Don’t you care for me? It hurts my feelings when you don’t listen to me and find your clothing all over the floor.
In the same way God asks us similar questions when we disobey Him. In His immeasurable love He would say to us: “I have taught you the right way, but you still insist on being wilful and going your own way. Don’t you care about Me after all I have done for you and all the lessons I have taught you?
What else did I do to receive emotional healing?
I looked at areas of unforgiveness in my life. Unforgiveness is not an easy road; it’s not a quick fix! You need to really open your heart to hear what God is saying to you and then react to it with all sincerity and earnestness that only our Almighty God deserves. Expect to do some merciless disciplinary work with yourself and that serious commitment will for certain be needed from your side. A thorough work of forgiveness doesn’t happen overnight. Trust God to show you the way forward.
Forgiveness takes time and effort. You need to write this out and you need to repeat it. You need to say it out loud; you need to work uncompromisingly with it. And when you are really feeling ill and don’t feel l up to doing anything, you need to ask yourself: “How committed am I to this road of healing? How disciplined am I about what is needed for the restoration of my health?”
I don’t want to sound harsh, but if we want results in healing, we need to do our part and walk the road in obedience to God and come into partnership with Him under His authority. He is always there for us, always ready to receive us, and we need to draw closer to Him.
I have had cancer four times and the first time I heard the cancer diagnosis was by far the most overwhelming! But since then, every time it reappeared God drew me deeper into a relationship with Him and revealed that there was more work to be done. My response was: “ But, Lord, I have done so much already!” And God responded with love and said: “Yes, my child, there is more you need to forgive.”
If we feel offended or get angry about this, the problem lies within us. It is something we need to sort out between ourselves and Father; not with the other person who is the offender.
Offense is taken, it’s not given.
At times during this journey my husband as my caregiver has suffered more than me. When I felt like I was dying while lying in that hospital bed, I didn’t know what was really happening. I hadn’t eaten anything for about four months and had lost a lot of weight. It was my husband who did all the worrying; I was heavily doped with meds and none the wiser about circumstances.
After six months of chemotherapy, I made the decision not to take any more chemo treatment. It was a brave decision, but one I had to make for myself. At this stage I need to make it clear that this is only my story and journey. But you need to hear for yourself what God is saying to you through His Holy Spirit. I am only sharing with you what I know Father was saying to me.
I had reached the point of no return; I could not face one more day on a chemo drip, because I felt debilitated by the effects of the treatment, the nausea and the fatigue. Chemo had caused me premature menopause, had weakened me and taken its toll on my body. I had experienced so much fear and anxiety around the tests and the scans. The continued interaction with all the doctors invaded my privacy. You know, it is my body that is continuously being interfered with. It got to the point like it felt my body is no longer my body. I was tired of giving all the control of my life to the doctors; they made all the decisions concerning all treatment on my behalf.
This whole experience changes and ages you as a person. My hair came out grey when it grew again, I still to this day experience side effects of chemo I never had before.
When I told my oncologist of my decision, naturally he/she didn’t approve of my decision and was even angry at me. But, within myself, I felt liberated; it was like I received my power back to decide for myself.
I believe Father created our bodies with an immune system that can heal us if we carefully look after our bodies. For this we need to make lifestyle changes, eat what is healthy for us, reduce stress, remove toxic relationships, resolve conflict.
God is my Master Physician; He is my Healer. God is my Boss, my First Port of Call, my “Go To” Place in time of trouble. He will always look after me and meet my every need.
Father has healed me of so much that I can now help others from my experience.